Fri, August 15, 2025

The Human Heart of Education: Navigating AI Use to Preserve Genuine Learning

By Simone Policano, Forum Education

After ten years of working one-on-one with students from kindergarten through graduate school, our tutoring team has witnessed a number of shifts in educational technology. From graphing calculators to Google Docs to today’s AI writing assistants, we’ve helped families navigate each new wave of innovation while staying focused on what truly matters: the irreplaceable human connection at the heart of learning. 

Yet the current AI revolution presents a fundamentally different challenge. Unlike previous educational technologies that served as tools to enhance human thinking, many of today’s AI applications actively seek to replace it. 

Recently, we’ve observed a new urgency in parents’ questions: “Is my child using AI for schoolwork? Should I allow it? How can I tell?” With tools like ChatGPT becoming increasingly accessible—and increasingly sophisticated at mimicking student work—these aren’t just theoretical questions. They require thoughtful policies at home that align with how children actually develop critical thinking skills.

Understanding how your child uses AI tools is as important as monitoring social media use or screen time. Just as you wouldn’t hand your child a calculator before they’ve developed an understanding of numbers, introducing AI tools before crucial cognitive foundations are established can fundamentally disrupt their learning development. When your child struggles to find the right word, wrestles with organizing components of an essay, or works to understand a difficult text, they’re not just completing a homework assignment—they’re engaging in what cognitive scientists call “desirable difficulties.” Research shows that these moments of productive struggle are essential for building robust neural pathways and deeper understanding. It’s similar to physical exercise: using AI to generate essays or solve problems is like using a mechanical lift instead of weights at the gym. The task might be completed more quickly, but you’ve missed the developmental benefit that was the true purpose of the exercise. 

Educational psychology tells us that children and adolescents benefit most when working on tasks just beyond their current abilities—what’s known as the “Zone of Proximal Development.” This understanding should guide how we integrate AI into education. But before establishing specific policies, parents need to understand how AI’s impact varies across academic disciplines. In mathematics, AI can solve problems and typically shows its work, potentially offering a learning tool if properly supervised. In writing, however, AI generates fluent prose that masks the absence of original thinking. Perhaps most concerning is research, where AI can synthesize sources so seamlessly that students miss the crucial skills of evaluating evidence and drawing their own conclusions. 

These discipline-specific challenges require age-appropriate policies. For elementary school students, the approach should be straightforward: no AI for schoolwork, period. This is when children develop their foundational abilities to think, write, and solve problems independently. The neural pathways formed during these years—through struggling with word choice, wrestling with math concepts, and learning to organize ideas—create the cognitive architecture for all future learning. 

The middle school years mark a crucial transition in cognitive development. While maintaining firm restrictions on AI use for original work, this is the time to begin open discussions about technology’s role in learning. Research shows that students at this age benefit most from active engagement with material rather than passive reception of information. To utilize AI in a way that increases engagement, make AI analysis part of the curriculum itself. Have students compare AI-generated and human-written texts, identifying the differences in voice, reasoning, and depth. This develops both critical thinking and digital literacy.

High school demands more nuanced policies. By this stage, students have developed more sophisticated metacognition—the ability to understand and regulate one’s own thinking processes. And as academic pressure mounts, it’s vital to have clear boundaries between acceptable and unacceptable AI use, particularly as students encounter AI in different academic contexts. In humanities, planning, writing, and editing must be done without AI assistance. For research papers, allow AI for initial source summarization but require students to evaluate and synthesize findings independently. In STEM subjects, consider permitting AI for checking work or generating practice problems, but never for initial problem-solving. Students who rely heavily on AI through high school may well struggle with the writing demands and independent thinking of college coursework, which AI cannot simulate. 

Regular conversations with your child about their work process become essential. Ask specific questions about their approach to different types of assignments: How did they start their history research? What strategies did they use to plan their essay? How did they approach solving that challenging math problem? Looking ahead, the students who will thrive in college and beyond are those who develop robust independent thinking skills despite the prevalence of AI tools. The goal isn’t to ignore or ban these technologies entirely, but to ensure they enhance rather than replace the fundamental cognitive development that occurs through academic challenge and productive struggle.

Your family’s AI policy should evolve as your child develops stronger independent thinking skills, but always prioritize active engagement over passive consumption. The goal isn’t to make learning easier, but to ensure your child develops the cognitive foundations they’ll need for genuine intellectual growth. Understanding and supporting these developmental processes will help your child build the kind of deep, flexible thinking skills that no AI can replace.

Simone Policano is Writer and Strategist at Forum Education, the nation’s premier home for tutoring talent, serving families attending top private schools across the country. With admissions experience spanning over a decade, including during her education at Yale, Simone is deeply committed to helping students uncover and articulate their distinct voices. Drawing on her background in higher education, the performing arts, and community organizing, she leads communications for Forum’s families to ensure that their students excel academically in an ever-changing educational landscape.